so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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