i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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