I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize
