I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Yo dont text me then not text me
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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