Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
