She's JV to your varsity
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
it's like heaven, but drunker
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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