I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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