At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?