Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit. http://tfl.nu/u5bn
  Replies (5) Good night (551) Bad night (1179) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends." http://tfl.nu/n1yw
  Replies (5) Good night (1348) Bad night (2241)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots. http://tfl.nu/wxgc
  Replies (6) Good night (3694) Bad night (671) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning http://tfl.nu/yyg5
  Replies (6) Good night (1976) Bad night (1049) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry". http://tfl.nu/b71c
  Replies (4) Good night (675) Bad night (1596) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own. http://tfl.nu/b2cm
  Replies (1) Good night (2839) Bad night (418) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  You fucked her?! HER?!

  (1-205): View more from Alabama

  She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): You fucked her?! HER?! (1-205): She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir. http://tfl.nu/jld9
  Replies (6) Good night (3464) Bad night (503)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com? http://tfl.nu/sqoo
  Replies (4) Good night (1135) Bad night (417) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself. http://tfl.nu/ezc4
  Replies (9) Good night (1223) Bad night (261) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on. http://tfl.nu/pfvu
  Replies (2) Good night (264) Bad night (524) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i came so hard i kicked through my windshield

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): i came so hard i kicked through my windshield http://tfl.nu/sfns
  Replies (8) Good night (2160) Bad night (281) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend http://tfl.nu/q3y8
  Replies (3) Good night (800) Bad night (179) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame. http://tfl.nu/5rwn
  Replies (1) Good night (618) Bad night (342) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina http://tfl.nu/xr6a
  Replies (3) Good night (783) Bad night (123) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line. http://tfl.nu/x7j1
  Replies (4) Good night (490) Bad night (93) Order T-Shirt

Randomize