using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize