so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Randomize
