Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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