But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
i think my cat just said my name.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize