vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
