As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize