Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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