Already got asked if we're dating
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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