I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
