they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
