I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
my sisters under your porch take her home
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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