yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
