It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
