Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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