You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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