dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
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Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
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He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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