i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
