what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
