And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver just had a heart attack.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize