it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
that's an acceptable place to lick
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
