I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
