You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
