I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
