Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize