hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Two words: blizzard sex
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
