does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
