it hurts more in the daytime
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize