Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
