You work out of a Hotel?
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
That's when you crack a 10am beer
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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