Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
