The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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