so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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