the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
