I feel great
I just peed on a car
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
