I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Enjoy the penises
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
