were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
