Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize