Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
