did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
you made out with another girl for some wings
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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