the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize