HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
