Walk of Shame. In a state park.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize
