Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
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you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?